When I announced that I was moving from New Zealand back to Virginia, I felt so blessed by the heartfelt support I received from you. I thought it only fair that I gave you an update on how it all went.
First, moving ain’t easy. It was a frenzied hustling for a full three weeks, and I don’t think I’ll ever forget the first Sunday I awoke with nothing to do. With no reason to push myself through another set of tasks or errands, I just laid. Literally. I just laid wherever I landed. And then it was time to go to bed.
But, man did I get some things done. Here’s the post I left on my personal Facebook account:
My husband is finishing his tour in New Zealand, and we figure we’re shaving a 3-month moving process down into a 6-week period. I do all the moving in while he does all the moving out. Come early May: bam! We’re all done, baby!
Is that grueling? Yes. Was this push absolutely necessary? No. However, something about it feels good.
I always have something to prove.
Sometimes I feel the need to prove myself. This isn’t the first time I’ve crossed the globe without my husband; I knew exactly what I was getting into, and I do it on purpose! Since my husband has provided for us financially for the last decade plus, I want to remind the world at large (and maybe myself that): I don’t need him, I choose him. Furthermore,
I like to Show Up.
As a woman, I seek to do this in several ways. I like to contribute. I like to change locks, earn an income, be fit, and nurture my family. Hell yeah, I’m every woman. My life and business coach once described it back to me like this: “You like to show up for everything that you do. That’s when you feel alive.” Exactly.
My happiness depends on me. But, he sure does add an extra scoop of joy.
I also learn a lot more about my relationships when I’m apart from my immediate family. I like the separation, as long as it doesn’t happen too often. I learn about the schedule I would keep if I didn’t have to compromise with or accommodate anyone else. I realize the role that each member of my family plays in my life. For example, my husband does all the things that really gross me out. I love that about him. He also organizes a hectic schedule and keeps us on track, while I have a tendency to chase butterflies and stray off-course.
Sometimes it’s lovely to chase butterflies. I like to take my time, and I strongly believe that the scenic route is most often the best option. However, after a week of scenic routes and butterflies, you start to feel like there’s a more efficient way of doing things. In fact, sometimes having complete focus and staying the course is the best way to get all of the grudge work off your plate.
Remember this feeling.
This is a critical time for me. It’s the push between zones: from where you are to where you want to be, and it’s uncomfortable and exhausting. My children and I are running ragged to get settled into where we want to be.
Take the day my children started their first day at a new school in a new country for example. They were all so excited … and nervous. Everything looked so different. Everyone was so new. I held little hands that grew weaker and more sweaty with every step closer to their classrooms.
Two of my children are introverts, and I watched them take on this big change with pure understanding of their gentle natures. There was little warm-up time, and they got thrown right into the mix … that would be unsettling for introverts of all ages! I told them to remember what I’ve told my own soul on many occasions,
In three minutes you’ll calm down. In thirty minutes you’ll warm up. In three hours, you’ll forget there was anything to be nervous about.
I am just so proud of us all. These are the challenges that shape us and build character. I plan on having a celebration of my children’s success in two weeks. The take-away is going to be:
Remember how you felt when you walked in on the first day, and look at you now! You conquered your fear. That school is your bitch. You can do anything at all by taking those same exact steps to achieve it.
We did it! Thanks so much for caring. I love you!
P.S. Here’s one of my favorite homecoming shots on Instagram (I’m FINALLY rocking an iPhone, and I just started an Instagram account!!): #Americangroceries. Until next time and all the best~
“In three minutes you’ll calm down. In thirty minutes you’ll warm up. In three hours, you’ll forget there was anything to be nervous about.”
What a fantastic mantra. As a major introvert who struggles meeting and talking to new people, I am going to try and think of this. Thank you for the inspiration!
Thanks, Megan. I’ve learned to be very understanding and appreciative of my introverted ways … sounds like you have too 🙂 Nice to hear from you!
Wow not to copy off Megan’s paper but…
“In three minutes you’ll calm down. In thirty minutes you’ll warm up. In three hours, you’ll forget there was anything to be nervous about.”
That’s so perfect! I do something similar when faced with tough times. I remember being in bad labor (years ago, but THAT experience always sticks with us, right?! LOL) and trying my darnedest (word?) to concentrate on the package at the end! Its great you are teaching that to your children. I’m gonna share that (hope you don’t mind!)
I really enjoy your blog Lisa and share your posts with my Facebook friends as “GOOD READS”. Where are you in Virginia? I was in Virg. Beach but have moved 40 mins west. I am from NY and we retired here a year ago, miss my daughters and grandkids so-o-o-o much but keep busy with my ceramics and jewelry-making PLUS I have a little project going for Alzheimer’s, called Jilly’s Bead Posse, with 80 members (ALL ladies I met on Facebook since moving here) so I’m not lonely, I have all my online friends. AND great bloggers like you! Keep up the great work lady!
Thank you so much, Shelley! I loved reading your thoughts here 🙂 I’m just outside of Warrenton, VA (outskirts of NoVA). I love all that you have going on down there! Thanks again for sharing.